異地戀——相思雖苦卻也甜
文章來源:未知 文章作者:enread 發布時間:2020-04-26 06:22 字體: [ ]  進入論壇
(單詞翻譯:雙擊或拖選)
When we hear that a couple live 11 time zones apart and can afford to come together only once in a long while, it’s natural to offer sympathy for the pain.
當聽說一對情侶身處兩地,彼此間隔11個時區,很久才能相聚時,我們很自然地會為他們的相思之苦表示同情。
We should more fairly envy them for their luck.
而事實上,我們應該羨慕他們的好運氣。
Whatever our longings1 may indicate, it is simply a lot easier to love when someone isn’t there.
無論我們感情是否承認,但愛一個不在身邊的人的確更加容易。
Far from an unfortunate necessity, living apart should be recognised for what it truly is: an advantage.
異地而居絕非憾事,相反,人們應該認識到距離對情侶是有益處的。
So much goes right when we live a long way away:
當伴侶身處異地時,許多方面都會更加順利。
Online or over the phone, we never assume that the other person should be able to read our minds without us ever having explained what is actually in them.
1、不管是在線聊天還是煲電話粥,我們都不會要求對方在自己未完全表達清楚的情況下,讀懂我們的心思。
We accept that we will have to describe our days, as well as our desires, in words and pictures.
我們都會用文字和圖片描述彼此的想法和生活。
We can’t help but do that thing that holds couples together: communicate.
我們能做的只有維系情感的必要措施——交流。
We accept that the other can live without us – and therefore make the effort to be the sort of people someone would freely choose to be with.
2、我們得承認:對方沒有我們也能活下去。因此,我們才不斷努力,讓自己成為他人愿意與之相處的人。
當聽說一對情侶身處兩地,彼此間隔11個時區,很久才能相聚時,我們很自然地會為他們的相思之苦表示同情。
We work at it.
我們在提升自我。
We can benefit from what jealousy2 otherwise prevents us from admitting: how much it helps us to feel like desirable, potent3 people
3、以往怕戀人吃醋而不敢承認的事,其實對我們有益——認為自己是一個優秀的、有其他人喜愛的人,
to be able to go out and flirt4 with someone else for a while without too many questions being asked.
并可以自由出去玩,跟別人調情,而不會有人質問你。
In other words, how profoundly loyal a whiff of surface disloyalty helps us to be.
也就是說,偶爾放松一下,反而能讓我們更忠誠。
Apart, we appreciate.
4、分開后會更重視對方。
It’s a strange quirk5 of our minds, but we only ever notice what’s missing: the money we don’t have; the weather we long for; the car we don’t yet own.
我們的大腦非常奇怪,它只會注意到自己身邊沒有的東西:賬上沒有的萬貫家財、一心期盼的好天氣、沒到手的汽車。
Yet once anything is securely in our possession, it disappears.
而一旦我們擁有了這些東西,它們的存在感就會蕩然無存。
We only see – in the sense of notice – what isn’t there.
我們只關注沒得到的東西。
The best way to lose ownership of something is to own it – and the surest way to forget your partner exists may be to ensure they’re beside you every night.
想失去一件東西的最佳方法,就是擁有它。如果你的伴侶每天都安臥在你枕邊,你自然會把ta當做空氣。
When we were apart, we can sample the gentle suffering of loneliness over the intense rage of suffocation6.
5、異地戀時,我們體驗的只是輕微的孤獨感,而不是同居時強烈的窒息感。
We never have to find out how much it can tarnish7 love to be with someone who has a different idea of a cutlery drawer or the correct way to suspend a towel.
我們無需發現生活瑣事對愛情的影響,例如兩人因選什么樣的餐具抽屜、如何掛毛巾而意見不合。
Too often, when we’re cohabiting, we locate the difficulty of our relationships in a very erroneous place:
同居后,人們總是把情感不順歸咎于錯誤的地方。
We think that it is the wrong person we’ve mistakenly got together with,
我們會誤以為自己選錯了伴侶,
rather than keeping in mind that we’re with a pretty right person trying to do an exceptionally tricky8 thing: share a home.
但我們該做的是告訴自己對方很好,只是二人共處一室生活太難了。
It may in the end – strangely – just be a lot easier to love than to share a bathroom.
到頭來,或許會發現:愛一個人比公用一間浴室簡單多了。
Our love stories are suffering from a mistaken cultural hierarchy9.
我們的愛情受制于一個錯誤的文化等級觀念。
Just as the book is often wrongly thought more important than the essay, so the live-in relationship is too readily assumed to be superior to the long-range version.
就像人們認為書籍比文章更有價值一樣,人們也常常認為同居關系比異地戀更加優越。
And yet, without ever meaning to do so, the long-distance relationship may simply, despite all its evident challenges,
顯然,異地戀給戀人們帶來不少困難,
throw up some of the absolutely ideal conditions for true love to thrive.
但它也在無意中為愛情的成長提供了絕佳的條件。
We should be wise to imbibe10 a few of the lessons life normally only teaches us when they’re in Sydney and you’re in Vancouver
我們應該學習其中的價值,因為往往兩人分處兩地時,你才有機會學習到生活給我們上的這一課,
and carefully import them into our lives, even with the people unfortunate enough to be right next to us.
然后細心將其運用于生活中——即使你的他不幸就在你身旁。



點擊收聽單詞發音收聽單詞發音  

1 longings 093806503fd3e66647eab74915c055e7     
渴望,盼望( longing的名詞復數 )
參考例句:
  • Ah, those foolish days of noble longings and of noble strivings! 啊,那些充滿高貴憧憬和高尚奮斗的傻乎乎的時光!
  • I paint you and fashion you ever with my love longings. 我永遠用愛戀的渴想來描畫你。
2 jealousy WaRz6     
n.妒忌,嫉妒,猜忌
參考例句:
  • Some women have a disposition to jealousy.有些女人生性愛妒忌。
  • I can't support your jealousy any longer.我再也無法忍受你的嫉妒了。
3 potent C1uzk     
adj.強有力的,有權勢的;有效力的
參考例句:
  • The medicine had a potent effect on your disease.這藥物對你的病療效很大。
  • We must account of his potent influence.我們必須考慮他的強有力的影響。
4 flirt zgwzA     
v.調情,挑逗,調戲;n.調情者,賣俏者
參考例句:
  • He used to flirt with every girl he met.過去他總是看到一個姑娘便跟她調情。
  • He watched the stranger flirt with his girlfriend and got fighting mad.看著那個陌生人和他女朋友調情,他都要抓狂了。
5 quirk 00KzV     
n.奇事,巧合;古怪的舉動
參考例句:
  • He had a strange quirk of addressing his wife as Mrs Smith.他很怪,把自己的妻子稱作史密斯夫人。
  • The most annoying quirk of his is wearing a cap all the time.他最令人感到厭惡的怪癖就是無論何時都戴著帽子。
6 suffocation b834eadeaf680f6ffcb13068245a1fed     
n.窒息
參考例句:
  • The greatest dangers of pyroclastic avalanches are probably heat and suffocation. 火成碎屑崩落的最大危害可能是熾熱和窒息作用。 來自辭典例句
  • The room was hot to suffocation. 房間熱得悶人。 來自辭典例句
7 tarnish hqpy6     
n.晦暗,污點;vt.使失去光澤;玷污
參考例句:
  • The affair could tarnish the reputation of the prime minister.這一事件可能有損首相的名譽。
  • Stainless steel products won't tarnish.不銹鋼產品不會失去光澤。
8 tricky 9fCzyd     
adj.狡猾的,奸詐的;(工作等)棘手的,微妙的
參考例句:
  • I'm in a rather tricky position.Can you help me out?我的處境很棘手,你能幫我嗎?
  • He avoided this tricky question and talked in generalities.他回避了這個非常微妙的問題,只做了個籠統的表述。
9 hierarchy 7d7xN     
n.等級制度;統治集團,領導層
參考例句:
  • There is a rigid hierarchy of power in that country.那個國家有一套嚴密的權力等級制度。
  • She's high up in the management hierarchy.她在管理階層中地位很高。
10 imbibe Fy9yO     
v.喝,飲;吸入,吸收
參考例句:
  • Plants imbibe nourishment usually through their leaves and roots.植物通常經過葉和根吸收養分。
  • I always imbibe fresh air in the woods.我經常在樹林里呼吸新鮮空氣。
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